Hur ser man att en bil är från.....

[Svennis]

Vad sa Gud när Eva tvättade fiffin i havet?

- Den där doften blir fiskarna aldrig av med...

[Svennis]

Vem har rundast kroppsform i familjen?

Sfär-far

[Usling]

My wife has this weird ocd where she arranges our plates by the year they were bought.

It's a very rare dishorder.

[Usling]

How did the man with two butts die?

- He was assassinated.
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Varför fick murarn sparken?

- De hade inte bruk för honom.

[Usling]

Törs man skaffa en såndär elbil?

- Nja, stor risk för sladd. Sen har de visst lätt för att volta också. Men lite spänning i vardagen är ju aldrig fel.
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What's the difference between Dubai and Abu Dhabi?

- The people in Dubai don't like The Flintstones, but the folks in Abu Dhabi do.
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How much did Santas sleigh cost?

- It was on the house.
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What's Beethoven doing in his grave?

-Decomposing.
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Elevators scare me. I'm taking steps to avoid them.

[Usling]

Did you hear about the soldier that survived both pepperspray and mustardgas?

- He's a seasoned veteran.

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I asked my wife if she'd like to go to the nude beach someday. She said no. Guess why?

- She's very clothesminded.

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I just thought out a pun about people that are unemployed. Unfortunately, none of them works.

[Usling]

Dra opp brallern' och skölj av hännern, för nu bline åka av!


Where i live i have to share parkingspace with my neighbor. I don't like him, but we should try to become friends since we actually have a lot in common.
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What do they call Karate for amputees?

- Partial arts.
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Did you hear about the guy who invented the knock-knock jokes?

- He won the no bell prize.
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Now i'm gonna tell you all about a vegan girl i know. I don't think you've heard of herbivore.

[Usling]

Varför är tomtens säck så stor?

- Han kommer ju bara en gång om året.

Vad har du gemensamt med Stevie Wonder vid ett fönster?

- Ni ser ju inte bra ut...

[Usling]

Hur ser man att en bil är från Kartago?

- Det står PUN på registreringsskylten.

[Sir Fish-a-lot]

- Tysklands äckligaste fiskart?

- Barschloch, en riktig skitfisk!